Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Fierce and loyal and loving

Todd and I recently listened to Amy Chua's book on CD: A Battle Hymn of a Tiger Mother. In it she vividly describes how she mothered her daughters, rearing them the Chinese way. Strict. Careful. Invested. Expecting nothing less than perfect. Hoping that someday her daughters would be great. The greatest.

In a way it was inspiring. As a mom I appreciated Amy's dedication, determination, and high expectations. But wow. It was heartbreaking. She described instance after instance of the fighting, the pressure, the tears and the stress as she forced her daughters to practice and study and perform. And all of it was never good enough. That's not the kind of experience I want to have with my children.

In contrast to the tiger mother we also read an article by the dragon mom, Emily Rapp. Inspiring and heartbreaking, too. I love this woman and I don't even know her.
Go ahead and read her notes.

As a young mom I'm still figuring out the type of mom I am, my parenting style. I think about what my parents did, and all that I love and appreciate them for. I observe moms all around. I consider what has worked for us the past three years, and what doesn't work. I'm learning and growing and I don't think I'll ever have it all figured out. And that's okay. But one thing's certain. I love these boys more than I could ever describe and I want them to know it.
I think I want to be a dragon mom: fierce and loyal and loving as ever.

I love the idea of parenting for the here and now. Not for the bright and promising future we parents are hoping for, but for our children--what they're worth--today. In her final thoughts, Emily says, Parenting, I’ve come to understand, is about loving my child today. Now. In fact, for any parent, anywhere, that’s all there is.

Here's for you, my kiddos, today: I love you!

One of Henry's favorites: Shredded Wheat with diggers

Riding with his "mask", or, the hat that Daddy knit for him

A favorite fall past time (now that the cold wind is blowing in!): Heading to the store.
Look how flat it is out here!

Bath time.
I think this is their favorite time of day. (Multiple times a day.) Can you tell?

1 comment:

Emily Savage said...

I love that final quote by Emily Rapp. Looks like I'm going to have to read that book as well. It's so important to love your children in the NOW, but it's sometimes easier said than done. Thanks for being a great example, Rachel :)